Bruce Willis Posters

I was reading iwatchstuff.com today and saw the poster for "Surrogates" a new movie starring Bruce Willis. Anyone else think somewhere in the advertising of "Surrogates" someone got lazy? "Lets take Bruce's face from the "Live Free or Die Hard" poster, put some facial hair on it, and paste it on a suit!" This idea will be used once again when Bruce Willis's next movie comes out called "Oh Look! There's Something Interesting to My Right!"

Look for the sequel "Oh Look 2: There's Something Interesting to My Left!" starring Al Pacino.

Coming Soon: "The Final Destination"

"The Final Destination" is coming out in August (that's alittle vague)! This is the 4th installment of the "Final Destination" series. You can tell this because they added "the" to the title. As opposed to "The Fast and The Furious's" 4th installment that took out all the "the's" = "Fast and Furious". It seems no one knows the proper way to show it's the forth movie (hint: add the number 4 or IV.) I digress...

I actually enjoy watching the Final Destination movies, they aren't amazing but they are fun to watch, so I will probably end up seeing this. I would however, argue that as the series goes on, every film can't be the final destination. Technically they should be renamed.

Final Destination = "Welcome to Flight 180"
Final Destination 2 = "On Your Left, a Terrible Highway Pileup"
Final Destination 3 = "Our Next Stop: The Amusement Park!"
The Final Destination = "The Final Destination"

Just a thought.

All this Final Destination talk has me scared. Should I be worried about the box of knives, rusty screws, and broken glass, that's held by a rope that is about to break above my bed? Nahhh, it's just a movie, right?...

IWatchStuff

Coming Soon: New Mini-Series "Maneater"

So in the mall I work at they just put up an advertisement for "Maneater" which from what I gather is a new mini-series for Lifetime. This caught my eye because, well, the main character is hot (Sarah Chalke) and also it's probably a show I will watch. OK the second part of that sentence is a lie. One thing I find funny is that it's called "maneater." This is a bold move for lifetime, which is a network geared towards women. They created a show that revolves around cannibalism. I never knew women were so fond of cannibals. If this series stays with the theme of most lifetime shows, which is men suck, then I assume the female cannibal will eat the men but they definitely deserved it somehow.

Below is a picture of what the Maneater poster should look like if they were truthful with thier marketing...

"Hannibal, eat your heart out!"

(drums: ba dum cha!)

Transformers 2 Advertising Tips!

So in keeping with the sequel poster theme today I bring you the poster for "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen," which comes out June 24th. This is the real poster which I saw while I was surfing the web. It's a really nice poster, definitely looks epic.

I can only imagine the meetings they had to decided on how to advertise the new movie. They probably spent days deciding on what advertising company to use. I bet they racked thier brains deciding what colors and imagery was correct to bring in a huge audience for this highly anticipated movie. Designers probably jumped out windows from all the stress trying to create a unique and powerful poster. And finally, using the most sophisticated software - and lots of money - the masters of the advertising world produced the poster above.

It's not bad, really, it does look nice. But I hate to break it to them but in a couple of minutes, for free, using simply Microsoft Paint I think I came up with a poster that would to bring in a huge audience too...


What do you think, wouldn't this make you see the movie?

FIRST LOOK: The Official "IRON MAN 2" Poster

You know that "iamchrisventura" is the number 1 place for all your movie needs! You didn't know that? Ok, maybe it's not, I'm sorry for the lies.

HOWEVER I do have the first official movie poster for "IRON MAN 2: RISE OF THE STARCH"** Robert Downey Jr. is definitely returning as Tony Starch aka Iron Man. You may question if all this is official, but I assure you I get all my information from a very reliable source. By "reliable sources" I mean I may, or may not have, made some of this info up.

Other possible title possibilities:

"Iron Man II: The Attack of the Pleats"

"Iron Man and The Chamber of Wrinkles"

"Iron Man & The Temple of Dry Cleaning"

...COMMENT if you have any more title ideas?

**THANKS NICK P. FOR THE "ATTACK OF THE PLEATS" IDEA!**

Poster Analysis: "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past"

So I went and saw "Wolverine" last night (which I enjoyed - not a bad way to start the summer blockbuster season) and when going into the theater I saw the poster for "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past."

Here's my analysis, from what I can tell from the poster:

So this movie looks like your standard Matthew McConaughey film - cute, romantic, fun...awww how sweet...but look closer!

It is clearly about a man who is haunted by the ghosts of 3 ex-girlfriends, who he killed. The tagline reads "You can't always run from your past" which leads me to believe that he has been trying to forget about these murdered exes but can't because he forgot to take down their portraits that hang on the wall of his apartment. Then in steps Jennifer Garner, who is the cute new detective in town, who is on assignment to find him and strangle him with his own scarf.

Now I haven't seen the commercial for this film but I'm almost positive thats the plot. Right?

Poster: "Where the Wild Things Are"

Continuing the movie poster theme...

This is a poster for the upcoming movie (based on the famous children's book), "Where the Wild Things Are" which doesn't look frightening at all...nope...well maybe alittle...ok maybe I'll be bringing a grownup with me, jeez.

Anyway I'm very disappointed because the poster is not informative at all, it doesn't tell me where even one wild thing is never mind multiple "wild things".

This I feel would be more helpful:

Much better.

"Is Anybody There" Poster

The movie's title is, "Is Anybody There" but is it me or does this look like "Michael Caine: Is anybody there?" Michael Caine is a great actor and all but I don't think the actor's name should be bigger than the movie's title.

On a side note I recently shot a movie called "Michael's Cane" the gripping drama of a man's relationship with his cane and the struggles he has when he comes home to find the cane wittled down to mere toothpick. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll leave the theatre before it's over. Compelling stuff.



(Yes, the first real post is about some movie poster starring Michael Caine. Random? Damn right.)