Bruce Willis Posters

I was reading iwatchstuff.com today and saw the poster for "Surrogates" a new movie starring Bruce Willis. Anyone else think somewhere in the advertising of "Surrogates" someone got lazy? "Lets take Bruce's face from the "Live Free or Die Hard" poster, put some facial hair on it, and paste it on a suit!" This idea will be used once again when Bruce Willis's next movie comes out called "Oh Look! There's Something Interesting to My Right!"

Look for the sequel "Oh Look 2: There's Something Interesting to My Left!" starring Al Pacino.

Sadly Another Celebrity Death Today

First Ed McMahon, then Farrah Fawcett, then Michael Jackson died. It's been a tough week to be a celebrity. All of them will be missed. R.I.P. When the news the Farrah died it was a big deal, but it seems she was quickly out-shined by Michael Jackson's death later that day.

Now Michael Jackson has been out-shined by another, and bigger, legend. Billy Mays.

"The King of Pop" then "The King of Infomercials" what the hell is going on?

The article I read said:

Tampa police said Mays was found unresponsive by his wife Sunday morning. A fire rescue crew pronounced him dead at 7:45 a.m.There were no signs of a break-in, and investigators do not suspect foul play, said Lt. Brian Dugan of the Tampa Police Department, who wouldn't answer any more questions about how Mays' body was found because of the ongoing investigation. The coroner's office expects to have an autopsy done by Monday afternoon.

The police did say that the place was extremely clean with various bottles of OxyClean and OrangeGLO around the house and he was found non-responsive but was standing up, smiling, giving the thumbs up (the picture above was shot this morning when he was found) - a true showman.

They are currently investigating Vince Offer (Shamwow guy) everyone knows he was out for Billy, and Vince is quite dangerous with that Slap-Chop weapon of his. Just kidding, but if Vince Offer was to become a infomercial serial killer I hope he would have a cool quote like, "pitch this!" or "If it doesn't say Shamwow, it's not!!" and *BANG!* your dead.

What a sad day for insomniacs everywhere. I hear there will be a huge tribute show for Billy Mays to be aired this week. It will looped from 2am-5am on the home shopping network. *Call in the first 30 min and receive a free bottle of OxyClean!

All kidding aside everyone mentioned above will be missed. R.I.P.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=asnF7cL271M

Odd Vanity Plate

So I'm driving to work today and on the highway I see the car in front of me has a license plate that reads "IKNOW" What the hell kind of vanity plate is that? Do you think she went to the RMV and they said "you know there will be a charge monthly for your vanity plate" and she said "I know" and that's what came of the misunderstanding? Or the RMV lady said "What would you like for your vanity plate?" and the girl was on her phone and someone on the other line said "You should really read "iamchrisventura's blog and comment on it!" and she said "I KNOW" and the rmv lady thought that was her answer? I'm guessing the second one.

Either way that could be a road hazard. What if a murderer is driving down the road thinking he got away with it and he then looks in front of him and sees "I KNOW" and freaks out!? Or a classy upper class women driving a new Mercedes, lets a fart out in their car alone, then sees "I KNOW" and she freaks out and misses her tea party because of embarrassment? That's one dangerous vanity plate.

...anyone think maybe I should stop thinking of all these things and focus on driving? Nahhhh....

New! E-mail Alerts from "iamCV"

Sometimes great things need to evolve.

One of the best examples of this is:
First came the wheel - then came the wheel of fortune.
Another good one is first came bread, then came bread that was sliced!
Then new technology stopped! This was because they knew they could not beat "sliced bread." Well not until now an anyway! Today I introduce to you, the best thing since sliced bread, *drum roll please* iamchrisventura e-mail alerts. Now you will receive an e-mail every time a new blog is published so you don't need to seek out my blog it will come to you!

UPDATE: I just bought a loaf of bread and you know what? This isn't the best thing since sliced bread sadly, sliced bread is too amazing.

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Going to the page and commenting would still be appreciated! Thanks guys! Just let me know if you don't want to get these e-mails. Sorry if this sent multiple times, just getting a hang of the e-mail alerts.

"RAWR!!!! Stay In Your Lane Human!"

Much like Bigfoot, we've all heard the legend of "The Traffic Barrel Monster." We grow up hearing stories of it roaming around the city streets trying to keep cars down to a single lane during construction, but never get a clear shot of it. Sometimes the news will show a crappy video of what looks like the monster's shadow. Or we turn on the news to hear a crazy southern women yelling about when she went outside to feed her dog she saw the monster blocking her from stepping on wet paint. But finally...a clear shot of the Barrel Monster!

Actually this is "art" that a college student made as a prank in Raleigh NC:

"NC State student Joseph Carnevale, the artist behind the Traffic Barrel Monster, has been arrested for stealing the barrels and "cutting and screwing them together to make a statue," which apparently is a misdemeanor in North
Carolina."

That's great I wish I could have seen that in person, I wonder how many people on drugs thought they were having "bad trip" when they saw that bad boy. "I'm freeaakkin' out mann!"

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"At $99, every pocket can have one"

Big News! Apple announced on Monday that there will be a new iPhone called, "iPhone 3GS" released June 19th. The "S" stands for "Super-dee-duper!" (gotta respect Apple for trying to bring the phrase back.)

Some new features include:

- 3MP camera (auto-focus),

- Video recording/editing

- Voice control

- A magnetic compass

- Preinstalled OS 3.0.

- Also it can be used to prop-up and uneven dining room table if necessary.

With all this exciting news of the iPhone 3GSuper-dee-duper, comes an awesome price drop in the original 3G phone. The 8GB is now ONLY $99!

One thing I really like is the tag line for the advertising of the new low price. "At $99 every pocket can have one." But the classic Apple advertising (shown above) isn't quite getting the point across that it's so cheap everyone can afford it. I worked up something that may get that point across a little better.

Ladies and gentleman, I present "Homeless Eddie (or "Xavier the Mighty" as he refers to himself)".....

"iPhone 3G: At $99 every pocket can have one."

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**If people are reading this...I wil be posting more often again!**