Text with Misspelling

I just received a text message that said

"Fat and Furious on Sunday let me know if u r interested."

Now it's clear the person was asking if I would like to partake in the viewing of the cinematic feature entitled "Fast and Furious" starring that gentleman Paul Walker and the Vin Diesel (as grandma would say).

It amazing how the absence of the letter "S" in a word can make the upcoming sunday night go from a movie night watching 4Fast4Furious: Africa Drift (I assume) to a night of watching angry customers at a McDonald's Drive through during the busiest hour of the day - when they are out of Big Mac's - now that's Fat and Furious!

Mayo Needs To Diet

I went to the grocery store yesterday and while I was in the mayonnaise aisle (yes an isle dedicated to only mayo!) I saw that Hellmann's offers a "light" mayo. Finally! Every diet I ever started I had to quit if I couldn't have mayo - it's a golden age in health! Anyway, my only question is --- who in the design department said, "Let's make our healthy mayo bottle shaped like a big fat person." I mean look at that thing! It's looks like the evil army of fat mayo bottles coming after you off the market shelf, trying to catch you while you run and run but its no hope!!!.... but who hasn't had that nightmare....right?

p.s.
About what I said before about the aisle being dedicated to mayo...I can't lie to you. It had other items also. I apologize.